Let's Talk About Sex, Baby
by vcg73
Summary: Burt muses on the talk he needs to give. Follows the events of "Blame it on the Alcohol" and "Sexy".


**I'm sure there's a million variations of this story out there by now (I'm kind of behind on my fanfic reading.), but I wanted to take a stab at it anyway. And for those of you following my Kurt/Mike story "Everything Old is New Again", don't worry. I'm not abandoning it. The muse just got interrupted by this tiny tale. : )**

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Burt watched his visitor leave the shop, a thoughtful expression on his face that sharply contrasted with the relieved one that Blaine wore. The boy's ordeal was over; he had said his piece, taken a shot at helping out his friend and survived the ordeal with all limbs and a reasonable amount of dignity intact. Burt's ordeal was just beginning.

Hands returning to the familiar task of installing a new carburetor in the vehicle he'd been working on, Burt's mind flew back to that awkward confrontation he'd had with Kurt a couple of weeks ago. It had been a shock to walk into his son's room and find his bed occupied by another teenage boy, ironically the very same boy who had just dropped his little bombshell that Kurt was uncomfortable with the topic of sex, and Burt had naturally jumped to the wrong conclusion.

What was he supposed to think, though? His 17 year old son had gone to a party, hooked up with another gay guy and then snuck said guy into his own bed for a continuation of their evening's fun. Or at least that's how it had seemed at the time.

In retrospect, Burt realized that he should have taken a clue from Kurt's totally calm demeanor after being caught. He had not been guilty or embarrassed or even defensive about Blaine's presence, and Kurt was just not that good of an actor. If he had thought for one second that he was doing something wrong, or breaking his father's personal rules, it would have shown. The way his insult and injury had shown a couple of days later when Burt had finally worked up the guts to confront him about his "inappropriate" actions in having a sleepover with a boy.

Kurt's demand to know whether he'd have been as upset over finding Finn with a girl had stung, because deep down Burt had known that he wouldn't have, and that had put his hackles up and caused him to demand an apology and a promise from Kurt never to repeat the transgression.

It wasn't really like he had double-standards about guy-girl versus guy-guy sex, though. He wouldn't have been as burned over Finn sleeping with a girl because Finn, as much as he cared about the kid, was not his child. If it had been Rachel or some other girl waking up hung-over in Finn's bed, he would have been irritated but he would have left it to Carole to lay down the law. Finn was her kid, therefore it would have been her job, just as talking to Kurt had been his.

Though, that wasn't exactly fair now that he thought about it. Burt and his wife had been attempting to present a united front ever since they got married; promoting the idea that either of the boys could go to either of them at any time and receive equal treatment.

The problem with that was that his wife tended to be pretty lenient about things like that. He knew, and certainly Kurt knew, that Carole had let Finn have girls in his room on occasion. Not overnight visits, but definitely unsupervised time together while there was no one else home. As a result, Finn had apparently been intimate with two or three girls already, including that pregnant girl that Carole had permitted to stay at the Hudson home when they'd thought her baby was Finn's.

Why wouldn't Kurt assume the same rules would apply to him?

Not to mention the fact that when Kurt had brought home that daffy cheerleader and made out with her that one time last year, trying to get his father's attention as he'd later confessed, Burt had just told him to respect her and use protection and then he had left them to it.

He'd only said that because he had been playing along, positive that Kurt would eventually crack and tell him what was really going on, and equally positive that nothing was going to happen between the two teenagers. Kurt was as gay as they came and a little kissing and flirting with a girl wasn't going to change that.

Unfortunately, it only now occurred to Burt that Kurt probably hadn't seen things that way. From his point of view, his father had given him the green light to have sex as long as he was careful about it. Why shouldn't he have assumed that he was as welcome to make out and/or do the deed with Blaine as he had apparently been with Brittany?

Crap.

Then there was the fact that Burt had been drilling into him since Kurt was just a toddler that a true friend never lets a buddy down when they need him. He had also made a strong case that driving drunk was a terrible and stupid thing to do, and that it was a sober friend's firm responsibility to take away the keys and get their drunk friend to a safe place if he ever found himself in that position.

Which is exactly what Kurt had done.

Kurt had clearly believed that he was doing the right thing by bringing Blaine home with him to sleep off the booze, and he was right, but plopping the kid into his own bed and then sharing it with him had been out of line.

Burt didn't care that they'd been fully clothed, or if they had slept above and below the sheets, or that Blaine had been passed out drunk all night. His son had slept in the same bed with a boy he had a crush on, and Burt stood firm in his belief that Kurt had been in the wrong. Anything could have happened. Kurt liked that boy, a lot, and if Blaine had put the moves on him odds were strong that he'd have given in to temptation with barely a fight.

Kurt was still a healthy teenage boy, after all.

Burt's hands paused in their work, gripping on the edge of the car hard as he stared in the direction of the departed Dalton Academy student. When they had spoken in the kitchen, Kurt had been upset because Blaine had apparently put those moves on Rachel Berry instead of him, claiming that the other boy was "experimenting" with his sexuality.

That had to have stung. Kurt had needed someone to talk to about it and he had chosen his father, but Burt had steamrolled the topic in favor of playing the disapproving parent card, more interested in extracting a promise of future appropriate behavior than in listening to his son's boy troubles.

He wanted to deny it, but Burt knew that he had deliberately steered away from Kurt's need to talk about that subject. He had avoided talking about sex at all, until Kurt had grown frustrated enough to finally come right out and admit that he had questions about the subject and wanted Burt to be there for him.

It wasn't easy. Burt had been avoiding the request inside his own mind for the last two weeks, the same way he had neatly avoided talking about the facts of life when Kurt was just a little boy. Burt had been thankful when his young son had dropped the 'where do babies come from?' bomb on his mother instead of him; relieved when Kurt got a little older and did not give any indication of wanting a birds & bees discussion.

He had made an awkward attempt after Kurt had started puberty and Burt had realized why the kid was suddenly laundering a lot more bedding than usual, but his own discomfort over the idea that Kurt was getting those nighttime reactions from dreaming about guys had made him stilted and formal. He had emphasized the need to stay safe and always use condoms, but the particulars had been left very vague and they had both come through that conversation more embarrassed and confused than they had started.

Over the last couple of years, Burt had managed to convince himself that with the wealth of information available online and all those girlfriends to talk about guys with, Kurt didn't really need a sex talk anyway. He knew his son had survived a couple of crushes, and he was uncomfortably aware that Kurt's liking for men's fitness magazines probably had nothing whatsoever to do with getting in shape, but he had assumed that Kurt had all the information he required and convinced himself that his own job was done.

In short, he had screwed up big time.

Kurt's friend Blaine, the very same kid whose motives Burt had been so worried about after that party, had come to him today because he was concerned that Kurt didn't know the first thing about sex and was going to get into trouble one day. Apparently, the two of them weren't hooking up at all and poor Kurt was so uncomfortable with the topic of sex that he couldn't even get through a simple conversation about it.

That was kind of a relief, but at the same time it was worrisome as hell. If Kurt was willing to chase after guys but had no idea what to do once he caught one, they might totally take advantage of him. Kurt might believe that he should let them do whatever they wanted with his body, assuming the heart would naturally follow and that sex was the same as love.

Burt sighed deeply. His son's heart was full of romantic dreams, imagining love to be all sweet ballads and hand-holding, soft kisses and slow dances. The poor kid had always taken a lot of crap for being the way that he was, most of the guys he knew treating him like dirt and making him feel that he was freakish and creepy just because he was gay. Kurt desperately wanted to find a guy who would welcome him and let him know that he was worthy of romance and desire. Burt wanted those things for him, too, but he didn't want Kurt to throw himself away, to just give himself to the first guy who was kind to him only to get his heart broken even worse than before.

Why had he assumed that Kurt would know the difference when he, the grown man in this family, had jumped to the conclusion that because Kurt's new friend was gay and had good manners that he was the one Kurt had been waiting for? That Kurt's life had suddenly settled into one hundred percent normal teenage territory and so he could handle it on his own from here?

"Time to man up, Hummel," Burt muttered to himself, squaring his shoulders and taking a deep breath as if to prepare himself to enter battle. It was time to quit indulging his own fears and give some serious attention to Kurt's. This was his responsibility and nobody else's.

Maybe it was a little bit late, but he knew for sure now that it wasn't _too_ late to do the right thing. Burt's son needed him and he was going to do right by him. Kurt believed, with a certain amount of just cause, that his father was too squeamish to study up on the particulars of gay sex. But if Kurt needed that information, then Burt would be damned if he let him down.

He would head over to the medical clinic right after work, pick up a few of those free booklets, or pamphlets or whatever else those places supplied, and he would read them cover to cover to make sure they were informative enough to give Kurt what he needed to know. He would not skim or skip over the uncomfortable parts.

His son had asked that he educate himself, that he be available to talk to when needed, and Burt was damned well going to do it.

Once he had done his homework, and in an odd sort of way it helped to think of it in those terms, because this was most definitely a test that he needed to pass, Burt would sit Kurt down and discuss the topic frankly and honestly. He would answer questions if his son had any. He would make sure that Kurt knew it was okay to speak openly about this part of his life. Most of all, he would reassure himself that Kurt _knew_ he was worth waiting for, that he deserved better than to throw his virginity away on the first gay guy who smiled at him.

Being a father wasn't easy, especially when you had a son who was your almost total opposite in every way, but if there was one thing Burt Hummel had learned throughout the years it was that the greatest efforts always yielded the biggest rewards.

He would do this if it killed him, because Kurt was absolutely worth the effort.

END


End file.
